Pre-Post: Well, despite my half-ass efforts I have not really maintained this blog in addition to the other two I’m running. I think I will just start posting the same thing here that I post on the blog for our 2-year bike ride, Barely Functional Adults. This was originally posted on April 23. As a reminder,this is pretty much an uncensored version of the events of our bike ride. If you are uncomfortable hearing about sex, drugs, profanity, etc you should check follow our PG-version at www.10LegsWillTravel.wordpress.com . This is a warning. If you don’t want to hear about these adult actions please leave now
Recap… we just woke up behind an abandoned(?) church after a terrible night of paranoid “rest”. We only had a short day of travel ahead of us into King City. Now, on with our tale.
After waking and quickly breaking down camp we hit the trail early. The morning fog reflected our moods and the damp darkness seemed to creep into our souls. We were all a bit on edge and uncomfortable, the night before had brought little more than stress that added to the physical exhaustion we felt from fighting the wind all day. The only bright spot was knowing we had a short ride, 10 miles, into the next city where we had a county campground available for only $5.
The ride itself was quiet and uneventful. The weather prevented us from really noticing or caring about the landscape and none of us really seemed to be in the mood to talk. After about an hour or so we arrived at the King City Starbucks and set up for the day. Anna had a ton of work to catch up on (part of the reason for the long stop) and we needed to secure a rental car so we could get back to LA for Anna and Higgs’ appointments. Besides the work and organizing the rest was much needed for our bodies and minds.
We ended up spending about 10 hours or so at Starbucks. The staff was absolutely great and we actually brought Higgs into the store. He was well-behaved and quiet… he just slept underneath the table. He is really pretty happy as long as he is with all three of us, though the parade of Easter Sunday coffee drinkers annoyed him from time to time. The hours were well spent, even if when we found out that King City no longer has a car rental place (Google fail) and we had to postpone the trip to LA until next week.
After all that work we were really looking forward to camping out and after about 500 feet of cycling we arrived at the campground. Unfortunately, the fee was $28 not $5… apparently I was lied to on the phone or there was some misunderstanding. Pretty obnoxious but still the best option we had available, we paid the fee and got to camp to set up. We were the only tents in the area, there were a lot of people in RVs “camping” nearby but they stayed inside their vehicles and watched tv most of the time. People like that are so lucky to get out of the house whenever they want to explore nature.
Our site itself was perfect. We had trees to set up a hammock where I got some reading in (“The Name of the Wind” by Patrick Rothfuss… if you like fantasy you should probably stop reading my blog and start reading this book. It kicks ass), a store nearby to get beer, and flat soft grass for everything else. There were also showers and a laundry place nearby to stop our stink. After a nice dinner we laid down for the night and got some banging in. It is becoming increasingly obvious that we are getting more fit because of the ride. Whenever I have sex with Anna or grind up on Hans the ass and legs feel much more toned, and I have even noticed some of my middle pudge slipping away. Apparently exercising daily for 4-8 hours and eating mostly fresh foods is good for the body. With our sexiness increasing and our bodies getting used to daily exercise Anna and I should be up to our 5-6 times a week bang schedule that we prefer.
With refreshed minds and bodies we set off along northwest again along the Salinas valley. Generally our routes have been pretty good but it is clear that Google bike directions are great in some places. Whether it is telling us to take roads that don’t at all exist or defining private paths through vineyards as “roads” you need to be cautious and comfortable with making changes to your plans. This didn’t through us off too much though, we got to explore some more farmland and enjoy a nice morning ride. We arrived in Soledad in the early afternoon and everything went to shit.
When we stopped in Soledad the weather was pretty good and we saw an opportunity to catch up on some work at a local coffee shop, get some more groceries, and take it easy before we plowed on another 10 miles or so. We didn’t have a place set up to stay so we were on the lookout for anything on the side of the road to offer shelter. But then the wind came and kicked our ass.
The wind really came out of nowhere… it went from a calm breeze to a ridiculous hurricane of evil dust in a matter of minutes. To be honest, it reminded me of Burning Man. There was a whiteout in the distance and I knew that our evening ride plans were dead if it kept up like that, and it definitely kept up. When it didn’t settle after a bit we decided to see what options we had in Soledad, which ended up being some woods by the Salinas River, a handful of churches, and a motel. We tried them, in that order.
After walking a mile or two in the crazy winds (riding was not possible) to the river we found out that there was a barbed wire fence around it and nobody was allowed there. This has been a common problem for us. Much “public” area is fenced off or restricted from use for no real reason. This is particularly true of city and county parks that don’t allow people there after sundown. How can you really claim a park belongs to the people if bureaucrats are able to criminalize simply existing there during a certain time.
Trespassing harms nobody, trespassing is about control and reducing freedom in exchange for a government officials convenience. I am sure they will claim it is either for our own safety (thanks daddy government for protecting me from myself, I don’t know how I ever can get my daily necessities like food, water, shelter, and jerking off without you… I would probably accidentally stab myself in the face while cutting carrots if it wasn’t for you) or they will claim that criminal activity happens during those hours. But that is bullshit too. To assume any person who exists in a location during a certain hour is going to harm somebody or something is to see us all as guilty until proven innocent. It is the opposite of justice. It is tyranny. There is no good reason that public parks (and other land) should not be available for all peaceful people to use as they wish as long as they do not harm another person or property. But, laws aren’t about peace or freedom, they are about coercion and control. Just remember, when the government fines or jails somebody for trespassing what they are doing is taking a piece of their life. It isn’t a free exchange. It is men with guns throwing others in cages and calling it “freedom”.
After the river was a bust we walked back to a parking lot in the city. I took all the stuff off my bike and decided to check out the churches by myself, it would just be faster for me to go alone on bike than all of us caravan all over the city. This didn’t end up working though, one church was too far, one had nobody around and no place to lay a tent, and one was in the middle of a funeral. The local fire department was also no help because there was some emergency a few blocks away that was taking up there time. It looked like the hotel would be our best bet so we crashed there for the night… it sucks, we are trying not to waste our time at damn hotels. We are learning though and getting better at finding places to sleep well ahead of time so we don’t get stuck in cities.
The sleep at the hotel was a little rough… despite some good sex. Can anyone resist banging in a hotel room? We seem to get later starts in hotels because actual beds are tough to get out of, it is just some much quicker to rise and shine when camping. We planned on hitting a beach campground about 55 miles away but in the end that just couldn’t happen. Our Google route again was filled with weird turns and it got to the point where we just cut through farms along their roads. I don’t know if this is legal or trespassing (or, as I like to call it, “finding the most efficient route from point a to point b as long as you aren’t told ‘no’ ahead of time”). We actually ended up riding along the fence of a state prison for a bit and the sounds of gunfire filled the morning air. I am assuming by the lack of sirens and screaming and general chaos the gunfire was the guards at a shooting range.
Riding by the jail was an interesting thing for me. I found myself a bit afraid and protective of the girls. There was one point when some prisoners rode by us in a truck and I felt the adrenaline start to rush. I know that most prisoners in America are unjustly imprisoned. I know that we have the highest per capita incarceration rate in the world. In many very real ways we are a police and prison state. Anybody can be chucked in jail for next to nothing and everyone just assumes it is just. I know it isn’t just. I know most people aren’t violent. But I was nervous just the same. Conditioning is a bitch.
By time we reached Salinas it was pretty clear that we were not going to reach the campground. I sent out a quick email to the only church along the way that I could find an email address for. (Sidenote: Why don’t churches have updated websites, or at least email addresses published that people actually check?) This turned out to be wonderful for us. Pastor Bill of Grace Community Church in Prunedale contacted us quickly and offered to let us stay at his church.
So, after climbing some hills, one of which Hans started calling “Pencil Dick” because it was long, skinny, veered awkwardly to the left, and she wanted nothing to do with it, we reached our home for the night. The youth pastor, Mark, met us there and let us in. Both Mark and Bill were incredible. They didn’t ask about our religion, they didn’t set up any stipulations for us staying there. Nope, they simply offered shelter for weary travelers. They were real examples of peace and love. Christians and non-Christians could learn a thing from them, and while I probably don’t agree with them on many issues they are the type of people I would want to surround myself with.
After setting up camp and some brief conversations with our hosts we got to bed. Only 27 miles ahead into the Santa Cruz area where we are staying with one of my friends… well, I don’t know what to call her, we were friends in college but also used to sleep together a bunch. Whatever, she is a friend and we are staying with her and her partner.
Post-Post 1: Also, we have set up a GoFundMe account for our ride. If you enjoy the adventure or just want to receive a post card, booty pic, or vegan meal check us out here
Post-Post 2: If you would like to see all our pictures you can check out our Facebook page at www.Facebook.com/10legswilltravel.