BDSM Test

A friend of mine posted this link on a private Facebook group that I’m a part of. At the link you take a test with a series of questions that try to align you with your appropriate kinky labels. While I don’t consider myself particularly kinky I found the test fun and interesting, if for no other reason it is a glimpse into the bedroom activities of other people.

My results are below. They really didn’t surprise me much but I had some thoughts…

Things like public sex and nudity don’t bother me, in fact I think they should be encouraged. We live in a rare time when sex is a super private activity. Before the industrial age most families shared one bedroom, which means children were around when their parents had sex. I actually think it is beneficial to see people have sex outside of porn. While there can be some discomfort or nervousness you soon realize that there is nothing to be embarrassed about. We all have “imperfect” bodies that jiggle and have scars and make noises. Sex should be fun and it isn’t shameful. One of the ways I have overcome some of my body issues and hangups around sex is to be in situations where I see other bodies in all their glory, and see other people having sex. Places like nude beaches, the Orgy Dome at Burning Man, and being naked with my friends helped me immensely.

The non-monogamist isn’t a surprise either, depending on how you define it. I think it is a mistake to define monogamy as being both sexual and emotional. I am emotionally monogamous, but sexually things are more fluid. And experimentalist is spot on, I like trying new things. Even if they don’t work out like I fantasized or expected it is usually an experience that I learn from.

I would say I am slightly dominant and particularly enjoy tying people up, which this test found. I don’t like complete control (like having a slave) but there is certainly a streak in me where I like to be in control in the bedroom. It depends on the partner a lot though. I think that is the most important thing… consent. Any activity between consenting adults is fine. Some people like age play or pretending to be animals or cutting or playing with feces… that kind of squicks me out but as long as all parties consent then they should enjoy it. There is a huge variety of sexual desires and interests, and thanks to the internet it is easier than ever to find people who have similar desires and interests. Hopefully, everyone is able to find a partner with whom they can be honest with about what they like or are interested in trying and can have a sexually fulfilling life.